Mother's Love

Bro Koay Kheng Hin

When pastor Gideon asked me to speak on Mother's Day I asked if he was sure? Maybe he was confused as I have done Father's Day before. I believe pastor Gideon heard from the Lord when he asked me to speak on Mother's Day because he may not know it, but I know I am blessed to be here.

 I would like to start with something like this. A man love his mother and the man love his wife. And one day they are both drowning. Who do you save first? I don't want to answer this question because I don't want to go where angels dare not tread. The answer would probably be, let me think about this. It's a philosophical question.

The mother may not say it but in her heart she would say save your wife. The mother's heart is always sacrificial. It will always be - the child comes first. And she would say save your wife.

Mothers are not perfect. But mother's have a special love for her child. If your mother scolded you yesterday don't think that your mother is not like that. But the seed of sacrifice and the bond to her child will always be there.

The Bible records that David lay with Bathsheba and Solomon come from that. This was after the first child had died after birth. When a lady conceive, and the mom loses the child, it is a terrible thing. Something that we cannot understand. And healing takes a long time. And when another child came along, there is a special bond that this child is God's gift back to me.

Proverbs 10:1

The proverbs of Solomon:

A wise son brings joy to his father,

but a foolish son brings grief to his mother.

Have you ever wondered why Solomon didn't write it the other way? That a wise son brings joy to the mother and a foolish son brings grief to his father? I think Solomon knows that a father's love and mother's love is different. A mother's love of a wayward child is different. If a son takes drugs both will be grieved but the first one who will say enough is enough is the father. When he has to draw the line, it'll be the father. But have you heard? Mothers will still secretly give to their son, like money. This is something that we see happening. When it comes to bonding with the child, the mother has a nine month head start.

That attachment with a child the father will not be able to really grasp. A mother's love has a certain empathising touch. The mother weeps in the heart when a child goes through a difficult time. It is this that expresses itself as a mother's love in a softness of heart for the child. And it is very direct. A mother will naturally want to embrace the child. That is a mother's love.

That love is drawn from two aspect, a sacrificial aspect and an unconditional aspect. That's why the mother will say save your wife.

This is where we want to look at where is the source of a mother's love. The agape love of God is expressed as sacrificial and unconditional.

Romans 5:8

But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

While we are yet sinners described God's unconditional love and Christ died for us described his sacrificial love.

That is why man will say only when a man becomes good does he deserve our love. God showed his love when we are still a sinner. And God is not all talk, he demonstrated his love by dying for us.

In the mother that sacrificial and unconditional love is expressed through her empathising for her child, that softness of heart and in the mother lies the capacity to love like that. On Mother's Day I want to say you are special because you have that capacity to lay your life down for your child and it's a gift of God. And when we say you have that seed, we have to nurture it. And we don't know how far you can go as you draw near to the Lord. That seed of sacrifice and unconditional love will grow in your life. It is a gift, nurture it and you will be blessed.

It is no accident that Solomon when God chose him was a pretty smart fellow. He was to ask one thing from God and he chose wisdom. And God said he has chosen a good thing. He asked for wisdom and God gave him everything.

1 Kings 3:27-28

27 Then the king gave his ruling: “Give the living baby to the first woman. Do not kill him; she is his mother.”

28 When all Israel heard the verdict the king had given, they held the king in awe, because they saw that he had wisdom from God to administer justice.

And here you see how Solomon used his wisdom from God in dealing with mothers. If you read the passage before these verses and you'll see how wise Solomon was in dealing with this case. Solomon knew there was a strong bond between a mother and the child.

1 Kings 3:23-26

23 The king said, “This one says, ‘My son is alive and your son is dead,’ while that one says, ‘No! Your son is dead and mine is alive.’”

24 Then the king said, “Bring me a sword.” So they brought a sword for the king. 25 He then gave an order: “Cut the living child in two and give half to one and half to the other.”

26 The woman whose son was alive was deeply moved out of love for her son and said to the king, “Please, my lord, give her the living baby! Don’t kill him!”

But the other said, “Neither I nor you shall have him. Cut him in two!”

Here you see an aspect of how a mother feel when a son's life is at stake.

In my school I have all ladies young and old. In a hall of 600 I can be the only man. When I told them I have a difficult assignment from my pastor to speak on Mother's Day and one person in particular told me, have you heard of a son's face where only a mother can love? You see, others see that child with their eyes but only a mother sees her child through her eyes.

I  am a reader of books but now I learn how to Google. So I read this story.

There was a child in school who is always asking questions in class. And the teacher got irritated with him because of his many questions. The teacher called the mother to complain that this child of hers is problematic.

The mother said my child is not backward and I'm taking her back to school him at home. This boy is Thomas Edison who has more than 1,000 patents.  That is why he was always asking questions. The school cannot accommodate him because he was a genius. But the mother saw him as special. The mum sees more, my son has potential.

But if the mum had listened to what the teachers said what would have become of Thomas Edison? That's a mother's love.

You also saw cases in earthquakes where they found a mother cradling her baby from the debris. That is a mother's love.

Today you've heard this, so what's your response. You may say I'll buy her a special gift, or take her to a special place but have you thought of what your mother actually wants? Mothers want obedient children.

I told my teachers at school that my mum seldom cane me and when she does, she canes me softly. But my brother will always kena. When my mum says come, he will stay at the corner and when my mum goes to him he runs around the room. He said not fair, mum canes him 10 times but only 2 times on me when we both did the same thing. I told my brother don't run. When mum says come you go and say sorry. But he never learns, so kena. Mothers want obedient children.

Ephesians 6:2-3

2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”

I believe a man who dishonours his father or mother cannot honour God. Don't be a Pharisee. If he don't honour his parents, he is in no position to honour God.

Some time back I had a talk to my mother. I told my mum it's not how much money a son has in taking care of the mother but how much love he has. A son who has money may not give her mum the care that she needs in failing health. While a son who loves his mom will find a way to find the money for her mother's treatment.

My mom is not well and I spend time with my mom. Back from school and I'll sit in the wheelchair by her. My mom used to iron clothes until late at night so I whenever saw her and decided to stay with her. She can iron with her eyes closed and I told myself I'll stay with her until she sleeps. So after a while I'll tell her to go to sleep. She thinks I must care for her but because she don't sleep I cannot sleep.

I just want to say this to all of you. If your mum is not well, honour and care for your mum. Mums will always care for their child but it is sad that children sometimes don’t care about their mum. I want to take this opportunity to also thank my wife because as a son I also have my limitations.

Now coming back to the question of whether to save your mum or your wife, you may have the problem but your mum will not. She will say save your wife. For mothers, the child will always be in her heart. A mother will always grief when her child is not doing well.

So finally remember this, always care for your mum when she's not doing well.